Monday, April 18, 2005

Beware of Frozen Juice

Many people walk around every day blissfully unaware of the dangers that lurk in the frozen food section of every grocery. Such was the case with me, prior to today that is. I was attacked today by a can of Minute Maid orange juice (with added calcium).

Here I am walking around Raley's on Freeport calmly praising myself for accomplishing my whole day with "clarity, focus, ease and grace" (something I am working on, okay?), I suddenly see a short line in the checkout, throw my cart into the spot, scream "I'll be right back, I'm just getting something I couldn't find!" over my shoulder as I hurtle down to aisle 3 (if I couldn't find it, how come I go right to it?), frozen foods, last door on the left juice.

I begin pulling out 4 or 5 juices, cramming them into my hands (ow, they're cold) when suddenly I inadvertantly liberate another can of juice which comes flying out and lands, right on its edge, as hard as possible on one of those very tender spots just below the ankle bone on my right foot. "F---k!" I scream, which attracts attention. I thank her for her concern, assure her that after all it's just juice, I'll be fine, hobble back to the checkout stand (where they're through checking and just waiting for me).

Seven hours later after almost continual ice and elevation I am still in great pain and my neighbor the nurse practitioner tells me there's actually a possibility I broke a bone in the thing, oh my god!!!

So I'm telling you, don't take any chances, drink only fresh juice.

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